This tired franchise limps as a slow paced, bloated, action and effects driven potboiler. Director Gareth Edwards known for big spectacle movies like Rogue One: A Star Wars Story and Godzilla can’t find a way to engage his characters and ultimately the audience in the stakes of a story that goes from crisis to crisis. It starts with a quick Jurassic recap over the course of the dinosaur story and this film shows how the creatures have become a boring sideshow attraction.
Some of the problems of this confounding mishmash of a plot reflect on writer David Koepp. He’s been on the writing team with this franchise since Jurassic Park 1993. He structures the narrative with parallel plot lines with dialogue about these dinosaurs that comes out of nowhere. For example, “When Earth gets tired of us, (they) will shake us off like a summer cold.” Or “Every day could be your last.” The film is choppy following two groups of survivors who get stranded on an Equatorial island inhabited by a bizarre collection of Dinosaur mutants.
It takes far too long for the story to get underway. The opening scene starts with obvious product placement of a candy wrapper in a lab that leads to a monumental dinosaur disaster. That, on its own, is silly by itself. We then join a Dad Ruben Delgado, (Manuel Garcia-Rulfo) his two daughters, Isabella (Adrina Miranda) and teen Teresa (Luna Blaise) attached to her lazy boyfriend Xavier (David Iacono) who is always high. They are on vacation on Dad’s sailboat in the middle of the ocean near the equator and face disaster when humongous sea creatures surround them and capsize their boat. It’s a frantic scene of survival.
It takes far too long for the story to get underway. The opening scene starts with obvious product placement of a candy wrapper in a lab that leads to a monumental dinosaur disaster. That, on its own, is silly by itself. We then join a Dad Ruben Delgado, (Manuel Garcia-Rulfo) his two daughters, Isabella (Adrina Miranda) and teen Teresa (Luna Blaise) attached to her lazy boyfriend Xavier (David Iacono) who is always high. They are on vacation on Dad’s sailboat in the middle of the ocean near the equator and face disaster when humongous sea creatures surround them and capsize their boat. It’s a frantic scene of survival.
Switch again, this time to Zora Bennett, (Scarlett Johansson), playing a tough security expert who seems more a callous mercenary. Johansson surprisingly plays Zora with cool detachment and we found it awkward how she kept smiling through these first scenes which were supposed to be more serious. She meets Dr. Loomis (Jonathan Bailey – Wicked) the curator of a dinosaur museum who really cares for these creatures. He is convincing as the good guy who wants to protect the species. Dr. Loomis is the brilliant academic who understands the inner workings and admires the dinosaurs even though the rest of the world has become bored with them
But when Zora is offered “10 plus 6 zeros” from Martin Krebs (Rupert Friend), the usual evil corporate bad guy who puts the expedition together, she’s all in. He wants to draw samples from the dinosaur’s biology to be used for a scientific breakthrough that could reap untold riches. Kreb is a by-the-numbers villain you know is going to get them in big trouble.
Zora convinces Dino expert, Dr. Loomis, to come so he can score big bucks to keep his museum going. Give Bailey credit for being one of the bright spots in the cast. He brings some energy, likability and humor to his role. A pivotal member of Zora’s team is Duncan Kincaid (Mahershala Ali), captain of the boat. Duncan is also very likable. He is the resourceful, protective team member trying to keep everybody positive and safe. Mahershala is fun to watch with his earnest eyes and winning smile.
Cut to the sailboat where a school of massive sea monsters surrounds and flips their boat, and they barely get out alive. This is the first of too many times throughout the film that the family and Zora’s team get separated, going back and forth watching both screaming and running for their lives. It gets predictable and tiresome.
This franchise also always has the elongated tense moment when one of these characters is being stalked without realizing it. In this case it’s boyfriend Xavier, while he’s taking a very long piss. Strange and silly way to get some laughs, even though Edwards and Koepp add a cute little pet dinosaur and a gigantic dino herbivore love scene as evidence that not all dinosaurs are bad. This film does earn it’s PG-13. Not really for little ones.
Lush location shows off meticulously detailed dinosaurs, a few grisly deaths and multiple jump scares. Sadly, touted as a crown jewel summer blockbuster, strict devotion to the franchise formula and the pedestrian plot make this supposed gem counterfeit.
Universal Studios 2 Hours 14 Minutes PG-13
